So, anyway, the important part is as follows. We each have different ways we interact with people, right? The author of this book has broken up the way we deal with people into four categories. We all possess these four categories and utilize them in varying degrees. However, we likely have one, or possibly two, in which we are very strong. More importantly, these different categories, or focuses, effect the way we listen to what other people say. Basically, I think this part is important because in understanding this part of yourself, you can better widen your horizon and learn to understand why some people react to you negatively/positively.
I'll try to summarize in brief on what this guy spent a couple chapters.
達成的 – Achievement oriented
Focus is obviously on the end. Characterized by evaluating people's accomplishments and victories in comparison with your own activities. Emphasis is on thoughts like “I could do that” or “That is impossible for me.” You burn with a passion likely based in a blind ambition towards the end point, and things are divided into two groups black and white The goal is the main point.
親和的 – Friendship oriented
The focus is on friends. You base your movements on your group, and often think in terms of your friends. “My friends are doing it,” or “Lets do it together.” Easily the least selfish kind of orientation, but also the most spineless. You either have a group of friends or you are toast if you are fully of this orientation because you draw your power from those around you.
献身的 – Devotion oriented
This one is kind of based on your friends as well. The difference is that you prefer to do 1-1 interactions and are probably prone to dominating said one on one conversation. You even prefer one on one interactions with your enemies. You think things like “If it will help to make him/her happy” or “I'll do it for justice's sake.” Basically, you value loyalty to individuals above anything else.
評価的 – Evaluation oriented
This one is basically your philosopher factor. You interact with people for the sake of shaking down truth. You carefully think about things before doing them, and even then really fear messing up. I think this one would be “I'm the kind of guy that would laugh at a funeral, can you understand what I mean? Well, you soon will.” You look at events based on whether they are interesting or not and you likely come across as KY or cold.
Really, I don't know where I fall in these categories. When I was younger I was definitely mainly devotion type, but then I went through high school and was mainly friendship oriented (still kind of am). College, I was, by necessity, mostly Achievement orientated. Now, I am likely mostly Evaluation orientated. Not sure. I do still tend to think in terms of “is that something I could accomplish or not.”
For those of you that are visual, Visuals!
図１９ 達成的 – Achievement oriented
図２０ 親和的 – Friendship oriented
図２１ 献身的 – Devotion oriented
図２２ 評価的 – Evaluation orientedAnyway, as you can imagine, certain types don't get along with other types as well as they could. I don't have the book in front of me anymore, so I can't check what they were. I think you can imagine though that a very strongly Evaluation type person would be very jarring for a strong Devotion type person. The devotion type would see the Evaluation type as cold and unfeeling, whereas the Evaluation type would see the Devotional type as excessively peaceable.
Finally, which type you are strongly effects how you interpret/hear what other people tell you. I think perhaps if I look into it more closely, I might be able to understand some reasons for past miscommunications.
While, I hope this helps you in some way.
PS... I just realized that I typed this all up without saving once... that was gutsy
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